Radical Rest: boundaries without guilt
“Say no when it’s not easy… Be unapologetic about disappointing others” - Dawn Estefan
Welcome to the Radical Rest Network! In this month’s mailout we share inspiration from our recent speaker on Radical Self-Care, details on our next meet-up about setting boundaries, and recommended reads from RRN members (now 260+ of us and counting!)
If you’re new to the Network, see our original research on barriers and what works for rest here.
Radical Rest Network online meet-up 6th Nov
Our next online meet-up is coming up on Wednesday 6th November, 3-4pm GMT. Join other RRN members for an hour of ideas, challenges, and support to make rest a priority.
This month we’ll have insight from Heather Thomas, whose wellbeing work with communities at Lightbox led her to study the impacts and needs of staff undergoing emotionally-laden work. She’ll explore the discomfort of setting boundaries, and how we can apply them in funding bids as well as our teams.
Joining us? Click here to RSVP: link removed as this event has passed
Learning from our September meet-up
Last month we had a powerful meet-up with insight from Dawn Estefan who created the Radical Self Care Journal for creative workers. Lots of you who couldn’t make it have asked to hear more, so here’s some of what Dawn shared:
Self care is seen as a ‘treat’, reinforced by the wellbeing industry.
Radical Self Care is grown from social justice & marginalised communities - it’s a political act.
We can feel it’s selfish, at work we’re ‘team players’ - but only if I feel fulfilled can I have resources to give to others.
Guilt & shame are linked to moments you didn’t take up your own agency.
Get curious about how who you are impacts how you see the world. Your intersections and stereotypes, your history with rest e.g. seeing parents deal with discomfort by being busy.
Rest is not (just) sleep: integrate rest in short bursts throughout day, slow down before revving up again. Ask self what do I want, how do I feel?
Key tips:
Radically select your support network (energy creators vs energy vampires)
Be proactive about your mental health
Be unapologetic about disappointing others
Take daily pauses when you’re feeling overwhelmed
Say no when it’s not easy to
Be aware when you’re choosing heart over head
Know it’s impossible to give 100% to everything.
Date yourself! Develop & foster a relationship with yourself - we’re often looking to other people to give us those things. Would you date someone who ignored your needs?
It was such a rich session, do check out the free Radical Self Care Journal for more from Dawn!
Recommended reads to inspire your rest this month:
Oliver Burkeman’s recent newsletter challenges us to choose Unproductive time, with evidence that the people who get most done are those who’ve learnt when to stop
Recent book recommendations from Radical Rest members:
A great overview of rest and how to do it - Rest to Reset
On boundaries - The Courage to Be Disliked
For those who find it difficult to prioritise - Scarcity: Why Having Too Little Means So Much
Free online Science of Wellbeing course from Yale
And if you’re new here… some of the resources on rest we’ve recommended again and again:
Podcast about the original Radical Rest research
Nap Ministry’s Rest As Resistance
Support and evidence for trialling a 4-day-week
Example of an organisation having closure times for staff rest
Low-cost counselling for Arts workers
Museums Association’s Wellbeing Hub
Rest research and support for Global Majority leaders